A while ago I made a decision.
For the last 3 years or so I have been painting and sculpting.
Painting and sculpting. Sculpting a lot and not painting enough. Sculpting for hours and hours on end and painting when I had a spare moment. I love sculpting, I love my wee creatures, I love painting, I love creating painted narratives. I work from studio and I also have a part time job. I have never counted the hours in a week I work (many many many), it does not matter to me. My artwork is a part of my life that is not counted in hours spent – more in how it makes me feel, how I express myself, how I live.
At the end of last year after a particularly gruelling few months preparing for the 5 large contemporary craft shows I exhibited at and the various exhibitions I took part in, the hours and hours of sculpting were causing problems in my hand and as it turns out I have damaged the ligaments in the palm of my hand – nothing that rest will help, scar tissue has now formed and sculpting causes me great pain.
It should have been devastating. Those wee creatures are my pride and joy, they are created from my hands and I love when people see them for the first time, I love the response they get even from those who do not love them as I do. BUT this hand injury has brought about the biggest sense of relief that I could never have foreseen. It has caused me to make a decision that I would have perhaps not made otherwise. In all the months of preparation for shows the sculpting took over and the painting was put to the side and it never really felt right. I was starting to focus on the making and selling rather than the creating and expressing and storytelling.
Soooooo!! At the beginning of this year I made the decision to focus entirely on my painting (alongside my part time job) and explore avenues for teaching art and to put the sculpting aside (perhaps not forever, but certainly for the foreseeable future). A change of path indeed. I pulled out of a show I had been wanting to attend for years, I did not apply for any of the brilliant contemporary craft shows I normally attend and I have been painting and drawing since the new year. It feels great. It feels like the right thing to do. It feels as if I am on the right path. It is scary and freeing and exciting all at the same time.
Now that we are half way through the year and I have not sculpted for more than 6 months I have no regrets (although I do miss them too) Perhaps someday the half finished sculptures on the tray in my studio will be finished but for now the ideas for new paintings are flowing, boards are waiting to become works of art, sketches are waiting to be developed. I could not be in a better place.
… is half the battle.
This is a lesson I need to learn and re-learn and make a poster of to hang on my studio wall.
With only one full studio day during the week now and a few weekends of out and about busy’ness I have been feeling a bit under pressure to ‘come up with the goods’ on that one day. So last Thursday, as I was sitting at my desk feeling a bit tired and sorry for myself, procrastinating and willing myself to begin working, 3pm came alot quicker than I could have imagined. Giving myself a swift kick and finally getting up to my easel determined to just put paint to paper no matter how it turned out I soon found myself enjoying just playing with the materials and lost in the process.
So yet again I ask myself ‘Why could I not have done this at 9am!?’ I would have had many more hours in the studio and enjoyed it a lot more. But again, I try to take note and learn the lesson. Sitting moping gets me no-where. Standing up at the easel and just putting brush to board, starts the process – and no matter what comes out, it is worth it.
So now to make a reminder to myself to hang on that studio wall!
What motivates and encourages you? What tricks do you use to get yourself out of those times when you feel less than inspired?
I would love to know!
The above piece is just one of the peices I finished in those few short hours – mixed media on paper.
Tis a bit later than I intended but I have been meaning to get back to blogging for a while now (September being the last time I posted) but of course the longer the absence goes on the harder it is to get back to. I am not even going to attempt to catch up on the last few months, suffice to say it has been a busy old time and a time of changes, both work-wise and personally. Last year was all about finding a new ‘normal’ and adapting to changes that were outwith our control and are ongoing but we are getting there little by little and whilst some things fell by the wayside (the blog) other things slotted into place just when and where they needed to.
But life is still good and I am working on a new schedule to fit around my increase in hours at my part time job which has been a necessary development. Ultimately last year I had been hoping to decrease my hours to dedicate more time to my artwork but life doesn’t always follow a plan and the result is that now I have less time in the studio but I am working on being even more focussed in the hours that I am there.
So the beginning of this year has already been about creating a new balance and a new structure and I am over the moon with how it is working out so far (please may it continue). This year will be mostly about painting and creating artwork that expands and develops my aesthetic and skills. I am excited about seeing how it develops. I have been beavering away in my large moleskine watercolour sketchbook, creating pages of imagery and writing and the ideas are coming together for a cohesive body or work. It’s all looking rather good!
So I hope I am back, back to writing and updating this space with my artwork and goings on.
So I am here to wish you a very very happy new year and I hope that 2013 is a good year for us all, full of hope, productivity, creativity and happiness.
x x x
Dear blog/blog readers
I wish you had been here with me last week.
I had a wonderful time with my dad in London. He got the train down from Edinburgh and I got the coach from Nottingham. We walked till our legs and feet ached and we talked till were hoarse. We plotted and planned and were ridiculously excited to be in London for this once in a lifetime opportunity. I am sorry it is all a bit secretive but I promise (hand on heart) I will let you know more as soon as I can. The weather was mixed but it was ok and the food was great. We went to the Portrait Gallery and spent a lot of time at the Mall Galleries. We got to meet some lovely people and I can’t wait to tell you more about it!
Lots of Love
x x x
PS – life is a little crazy right now but I will try to keep you updated!!
Hello there! Thanks so much for all your recent comments – I am terribly behind with replying to them all (as ever) but hope to get it done soon.
Today is a day of appointments, my creative writing meet-up and odd jobs. I have been busy sculpting away this week in preparation for all the events I have coming up and I need to prepare for my upcoming workshop this Saturday so it is just going to be one of those days where although I am bobbing about everywhere, all I really want to do is sit and sculpt or start the next painting. Oh the life of a self-employed artist. I am glad to be on annual leave from my part time job this week so that I can get caught up.
Hope you are having a wonderful week!
The last few weeks have been full of exciting news, some of which I have been able to share and some that for now I have to keep secret. This week has been no different in that I have discovered that thanks to Seek & Adore, Tomas has been popping up in a few magazines and newspapers as part of a feature on Fairy Tales. I was then delighted to receive a phone call from Design Factory letting me know that they were featuring me on their website as their very first ‘Blogger of the month’.
So with a noticeable rise in my blog readers and comments received, I had better make sure I continue to write something as often as I can! Thank you so much for popping in here and/or leaving such thoughtful comments whether you have found me via the Design Factory website or are a long-time reader.
This morning I trotted on off to class. I have not mentioned it here but for the last few weeks I have been attending a creative writing course at my local Maggies Centre* and I love that walk up the above steps on Friday morning where I have a chance to do something completely different from my normal day to day. The tutor is brilliant and I have learned so much about how I can write and just be myself using prompts and various writing tools. The course is coming to an end soon unfortunately but I think the class members are hoping to continue meeting and inspiring each other with ideas to keep writing so I shall be doing that for sure.
One thing that I think may come out of it is that I am hoping to regenerate my very short-lived blog ‘A Notion To Wander’ which I began a while ago but the timing was bad for me to continue it. Now that I am writing regularly again I hope to revisit it and possibly share some of my meandering thoughts over there. I am also hatching another wee plan loosely connected to this so will keep you updated on that!
This afternoon is a date day with my husband and we are off to the cinema and for something to eat so cheerio for now!
*The Maggies Centre website seems to be down at the moment so I have linked to an article which explains a little about them and what they do
x x x
Oh I am a bad blogger. I know it. I go through fits and starts. I have lots to say but I worry that I am boring, repetitive, self-obsessed. I wish to be more organised and schedule posts and really think about what I want to say and show here but I just can’t quite get to it.
Sorry for the whiney post. It is late and I should be in bed. Life is a bit tough at the moment ….stuff….you know how it goes. Life stuff, Health stuff, Heart stuff. It is just typical that when I am desperate to voice my thoughts and talk… I clam up here. I admire folks who can be truthful and honest on their blogs.. I really do. But there is much that I cannot say here.
I am working away in the studio as much as I can but finding it hard to balance with my part-time job at the moment and am feeling completely overwhelmed with how quickly time passes by and all the things I want to be doing. I need to get focussed and get real about what I can do.
I need to not whine into the ether and just get on with it all. I need to not be tempted to delete this post in the morning and just let it be….I guess it shows that real life happens too. I will be back!! With exciting news – things that are happening and work that is being created in my studio. This one above is one of my recent favourites – this is the kind of art I want to make. Intense and a bit challenging. Not wishy washy like some of my work can tend to be. Perhaps this is the root of my exhaustion and uncertainties – change is afoot in my work and I am battling through it. Tis not the sole reason but possibly part of it.
If you are still visiting, thank you…really. I do appreciate it so very much. If you have any ideas on how I can inform and entertain you then please let me know!!
See you on the other side!!
(PS – thanks to Al for giving me the boot up the bum that I needed to pop in here and say hello….visit his blog – it is ace)
x x x